Painted Skin II Resurrection

China!

Obviously, they have no equal!

Seriously, this movie was GAY GAY GAY even without being gay! If you can believe that! Actually, by now you should because this isn’t the first time, nor the second, that China has released a movie that should be gay but they choose to frikkin stick behind their great walls!

Like, WTF!

Seriously, this movie’s problem could have been solved with one simple solution…The Fox Demon (Xun) and the Princess (Vicki) just had to stay together , just being together, would have solved everything!

But Nooooooooooooooooooo

They just continuously teased us to death throughout the whole thing. I kid you not that half of this movie’s frames could pass the yuri board inspection!

I swear it!

But I warn you to not go mentioning that this is a yuri movie at convetions because you might be stoned to death! May be in a few years when the word ‘yuri’ is no longer associated with lesbian sex you can but not right now…Well, you can tell me because I am already at that time in the future (What, you know not of time travel…pfft)

 
 
 

 
 

 
 
 

 

Any who, long story short, The Fox Demon, who had been imprisoned for 500 years in an ice prison (an active Ice prison which still chases her wherever she goes) for using her magic to help a human all those years ago because of love finally gets freed when a young bird demon sets her free. Demons feed on human hearts but this Fox is not simply looking for a pleasure for the body but the miracle of turning into a human and experiencing feelings (which demons don’t have as they have no senses other than sight and touch).

To turn into a human, a Demon needs to have a freely given heart, which has to be pure and they need the eclipse for the magic of transformation to work…permanently. Ms Fox has strong enough magic to make the exchange but it does not last.

And so she searches for a pure heart which must be freely given (Heh, good luck with that), while at the same time running away from the cold curse of a prison coming after her till eternity.

It is on her journey that she finally stumbles upon the Princess (who was at the time disguised as a man) through one of her traps to attract  gullible (or maybe good-hearted) men. Ms Fox is surprised at the warmth in this warrior’s heart that is so hot, it actually holds the Ice Prison after her at bay.

So you must imagine how much Ms Fox wanted that heart. She did everything in order to get it but it all came down to her Highness freely giving it away.

Speaking of her Highness, she has problems of her own. She bumps into Ms Fox because she was on the run from the palace to go to where her childhood love was stationed at the borders. Her Highness used to be beautiful, probably the most beautiful girl in the country (what, she was a Princess) but on that fateful day out with the mentioned boy, she runs into a Bear in the woods (Stay out of the woods kids) which nearly rips off her head but luckily only half her face was the price to pay.

And so, the mighty Princess isn’t so beautiful anymore and has to wear half an face mask ( a la the Phantom of the Opera) in public. They boy ran away from her and hasn’t been seen since then. Probably still in le shock of that face.

Even now that the Princess catches up with him, he still doesn’t give her the light of day and while he says that it’s because no one is worthy of the Princess, we all know better. After al, he can’t seem to take his eyes off the Foxy Demon!

The Princess gets distressed when she gets rejected, kinda, and goes to commute suicide via clip diving (which was kinda cool looking) but she gets saved by Ms Foxy because, hello, she must have that heat…I mean heart, for herself.

 
 

 
 
 

 
 

And so the two grow closer after that and get to know each other more, so does the plotting get deeper.

Her Highness finally thinks on her feet. There was a very old and powerful Demon right next to her. Surely she knows of legendary magic. Surely beauty products aren’t beyond her magic wand. And so she asks the question.

Ms Foxy can’t fix her (sadly) but she has option B (and C and D and E and…) and that is that since they aren’t humans, changing something like their appearance is as easy as changing clothes. And so she changes her clothes with the Princess as an experiment to prove that men only see the beauty of a woman. But not all is roses, the Princess has to return to her own skin in twelve hours lest to decay and fade away.

And so the two help each other with Ms Foxy lending her beauty to the Princess while in return…

 

 
 

Keeps the prison away from Ms Foxy.

I mean people, it was like Fate was showing them to each other as a reward for all that suffering and yet what did they do?

“….”

I am so disappoint I feel depressed!

Any way the Princess finally catches onto Ms Fox’s schemes and inquires why the games. Surely she was powerful enough to take her heart by force. But Ms Fox explains that the heart has to be one given to her freely by the human’s free will in order for it to be beneficial otherwise it would just be a rotten piece of fresh due to fear (at the time of death).

 
 

Both having lost so much and thus having nothing left to fear, with the Princess too desperate to be with her love even if it means doing it as someone else or with borrowed beauty, while the Fox Demon will do anything to be human and she would rather die than go back to that prison (though she can’t by her own means).

And so they seal the deal and finally swap bodies instead of just skin since her Highness gave her heart to Ms Fox freely. Now all they had to do to seal the deal for eternity would be for her Highness to devour a human heart and she would be a true demon.

But obviously there is no true happiness because these two don’t even get a day to enjoy their new lives before their karma for fucking up Destiny’s gift (of having them meet each other) kicks in. Ms Fox (who is now in her Highness’s body) is scheduled to be married off to a cult Empire who plan to sacrifice her heart in order to revive their dead Prince (who was killed by Ms Fox before meeting her Highness) while her Highness (who is a Demon now) is struggling to resist eating human hearts which might have looked to her like a cup of fresh water after five days in the desert.

With the two separated the prison catches up with her Highness and there is no Ms Fox to save her so she slowly starts to freeze and since she hasn’t really truly demonized, she will obviously die from it. The men finally do something useful and re-unite the two and right on time because it was the eclipse and the two swap back.

Actually I am not too sure of what happened. From the epilogue speech, it sounded like the two became one, which doesn’t make an ounce of sense! And there was no time to know by our own judgment because there wasn’t enough time to see her Highness/Ms Fox and judge ourselves.

Any way the movie ends at a non-yuri point!

Surprise, surprise….

I would roll my eyes but the effort isn’t warranted!

Such great potential…frikking pissed on! Would it kill them to just make them get together?! Seriously, would it?!

*Curses*

Oh well, great caps at least, am I right?